Why I Overthink

The question of the day is "why".  Remember that.

Whether you believe me or not, everything happens for a reason.  I'm not being deep and philosophical.  I'm not suggesting some large-scale cosmic plan in which everything is working toward some common purpose.  I'm being very literal.  Everything happens for a reason.

Here are some examples.

You overslept this morning.  Why?  Your alarm didn't go off at the right time.  Why?  Your phone thought that it was daylight savings time.  Why?  Your phone gets its time from the phone company which provided it with the wrong time.  Why?  The government changed the date for daylight savings time relatively recently and your phone company didn't properly update to account for it.  Thus, you overslept because your phone company wasn't paying attention.

You broke up with your significant other.  Why?  They cheated on you.  Why?  They didn't feel they were getting what they needed from you, so they found it elsewhere.  Why?  They didn't properly communicate with you about what they needed out of the relationship.  Why?  You didn't ask.  Thus, you broke up with your significant other because you didn't communicate with them.

You failed your test.  Why?  You didn't study.  Why?  You thought you understood the material.  Why?  You seemed to understand it all in class.  Why?  You only paid attention to the examples he showed you that were easy and zoned out during the harder ones.  Thus, you failed your test because you zoned out during class.

You see?  Everything happens for a reason.  You could stop before any of the "why"s in these sequences and use that as your reason for why something happened.  You could also follow these reasons up with more "why"s and get completely different reasons.

I said that "why" is the question of the day.  I don't think people ask this question enough.  Asking why something happened can help you make sure that it doesn't happen again.  It can also lead you to believe that nothing is your fault and that ultimately someone else is responsible for your actions.  I'm not going to tell you that . . . today.  Not asking "why" enough means you aren't getting the whole story.  Asking "why" too much will lead you to eliminate the possibility of free will.  That's scary.

The trick, as is so often the trick, is moderation.  You have to ask "why" enough to get to a point that you can do something about it.

In the oversleeping example above, it's easy to continue on and pin the blame on the phone company, but if you do that, there's not really anything you can do about it.  If you stop sooner and look at the fact that your phone didn't know the correct time because it gets its information from the company, you find that there's a solution:  set another alarm that doesn't rely on anything but its own power.

In the breaking up example, it's extremely easy to stop at your significant other cheating on you, but that doesn't help anything.  Continuing on allows you to see that in future relationships, you need better communication. 

In the test example, it's easy to stop at "you didn't study", but that probably won't fix this problem in the future because of that reason's "why".  If you think you understand the material, even if you do force yourself to study, you won't study well because you think you understand it.  By following this one further, you find that you are zoning out in class which is something you can change, it will just take some work and may require a few more "why"s to reverse.

On the way back to my dorm tonight, I was, as I have found I enjoy doing more than I care to admit, listening to a radio show where people call in and talk about their problems.  Tonight, however, I found myself very frustrated with the people on the show, because they didn't ask that beautiful question of the day.

Most of the people in the show tonight were calling about problems with relationships.  Either it was that they had broken up with their significant other or that their family didn't approve of said other.  In both cases, these people didn't ask "why".  Your girlfriend's family is upset with her suddenly after she moves in with you before the two of you get married.  Why?  Your boyfriend feels like he can communicate with his friend better than with you.  Why?  Your family is calling you a whore.  Why?

It was driving me nuts.

If you are a regular reader, you have probably learned by now that I have a tendency to overthink things.  I know that about myself.  I'm ok with that.  I'm telling you this for a reason.  Why?  I think being an overthinker is much better than an underthinker.  Why?  If you underthink, you may end up stuck with something you can't change.  If you overthink, you can always back up a few steps and find something you can change.

You can follow the "why"s all the way back to the beginning of time.  I did it once.  It was scary.  It creates a long, complicated chain that inevitably makes everything God's fault.  Unfortunately, that takes the situation out of your hands.  You can settle for that and assume that nothing is your fault or you can realize that a chain doesn't work if it's missing a link.

By breaking the chain at a single point, you eliminate the end of it.  All you have to do is find one link in the chain that you can cut, and you can avoid ever reaching the end of that chain again.

By setting another alarm, communicating in future relationships, and making sure you don't zone out in class, you break the chain and make sure you don't reach the endings of oversleeping, nasty break ups and failing tests.  You just have to find the one link you're strong enough to break.

Just ask "why".  Overthinking isn't as bad as you think.

What Other People Wish For

Last night at Bible study, Preach'rman, in addition to putting me onto a new philosophical bend, told a story.  It was one I had heard many times before in many different ways, and you probably have to.  However, I must insist on forcing you to read it at least once more:

There were three friends who were all in college.  One attended Texas Tech, one was from UT and one was an Aggie.  The three friends decided one afternoon to go out on a lake.  As they were out in their boat, a storm blew up around them.  There was thunder and lightning and they couldn't see the shore.  Coincidentally, a lamp happened to float by.  One of them picked up the lamp and a genie came out of it offering each of them one wish.

The Texas Tech student said, "I wish I were safe back in Lubbock."  Suddenly, he was back in his dorm on the Tech campus.

The UT student stepped up next and said, "I wish I were safe back in Austin."  Suddenly, he was back in his dorm on the UT campus.

The Aggie, looking around at the storm.  He saw the lightning and heard the thunder.  He felt the waves rocking the boat beneath him and he was utterly terrified.  This was even worse now that he was alone.  He looked around and said, "Boy, I'm scared!  I sure wish I had my friends back!"

At the end of Preach'rman telling this story, someone said, "Be careful what you wish for!"  My mom leaned over and wisely whispered to me, "Be careful what OTHER people wish for!"  I laughed.

This didn't really strike me as anything important until this afternoon as I was doing my defensive driving course.  (Don't ask!)  The part I was working on today was talking about drunk driving.  (No.  That has nothing to do with why I was taking the course.)  It told the story that so many of us have been exposed to before.  It was the story of the very pretty girl who was hit by a drunk driver and was horribly horribly scarred.  I won't force you to look at the pictures, but in case you don't remember, Google Jacqueline Saburido.

This story made me think back to Preach'rman's story and my mom's comment.

We talk a lot about how our choices affect others, but do we ever really stop to consider the implications of that statement?  If everyone's choices affect someone else, doesn't that mean that someone else's decisions are inevitably affecting you?

I have a website set as my homepage that offers a new sci-fi flash fiction every day.  In case you don't know, flash fiction is like short stories but shorter.  The most famous example of flash fiction is from Ernest Hemmingway.  His friends challenged him to write a story using only six words.  This was the result:

For sale:  baby shoes, never worn.

This has spawned an entire (wonderful) website:  SixWordStories.net.

Most flash fiction does not put quite such a limitation as six words, but the idea of brevity in the story telling is the idea.  In Hemmingway's example, he has characters, plot, and story.  It is, in my opinion, a beautiful example.  The idea of flash fiction is to get in, give the reader the story, and get out.  My homepage, 365 tomorrows, limits their submissions to 600 words.  As you have probably gathered from this blog, brevity is not my gift.  I have great respect for these authors.

Believe it or not, this does apply to what I was talking about.  Bear with me.

I say all of this to set up today's flash fiction from 365 tomorrows:  To The End of Time, Or Lisa.  As I was watching the thing about Jacqueline, I was reminded of this story.  Particularly, I was reminded of this quote from when he is talking to Lisa:

"Both of us live in a different instance of our universe, everyone does, but the funny thing is, ours overlap at this exact moment."

I was reminded of this quote, because, were it not for the man's drinking, his instance of the universe likely would never have overlapped with Jacqeline's.  Likely, they would never have met each other.  And yet, in that one cataclysmic moment, their worlds crossed and neither were ever the same after that.  I'll admit it's an extreme example, but usually those are the ones that make you start to look at the idea.

If we generalize this, every time you meet a person, your life intersects with theirs.  As such, however small the change, you are never the same again.  Simply their presence in your life, if nothing else, changes you in the fact that you have now come in contact with one more person.

Now consider this.  That person chose to take the path they did that caused the two of you to meet.  Had they not chosen that path, you would never have met, your worlds would never have crossed, and you would remain unaffected by the interaction that never happened.  Thus, their choice changed your life forever.  Every time your world meets someone else's, their choice has changed you forever.

Sometimes, the world isn't fair.  If it were, your choices would affect you.  You would only ever be punished for your own mistakes and no one would be able to change you but you.  However, this is not the way it is.  Other people's choices do affect you every day.  You may not be able to buy what you want at the store, because someone chose to buy the last one.  You may miss the light, because someone else decided to drive slowly.  You may be horribly scarred in a car accident, because someone else decided to drink and drive.

You may be dragged back into the middle of the storm, because some Aggie gets scared.

"Be careful what other people wish for."

Life really isn't fair.

The Big Four Nine

I just looked at my screen when I logged in to post tonight and realized that this is my 49th post.  That means the next time I post will be the big five o!  This is an exciting thing for me!  Why?  Well that is the question.

I thought about just accepting that hitting my 50th post was just a big milestone and leave it at that.  ACHOO!  Then I realized, that's incredibly boring!  I can do better than that!  So I started thinking, what makes the 50th post more important than the 49th?

I thought about several reasons for these ranging from cosmic allignments to linguistic history.  I finally settled on number theory.  It made the most sense and had some actual basis in fact.

Our number system is base ten.  In other words, we have ten digits (zero through nine).  This means that ten is the first two digit number.  100 is ten squared.  That automatically makes it seem important.  Our number system is based on the number ten and this is ten ten times!  This automatically makes 50 important because it's halfway to 100!  You see?  It almost pretends to make sense!  The 50th post must be important!

Then I started thinking about the reasons why 100 is important.  It's ten squared.  Then I realized that 49 is also a square.  49 is seven squared.  49 is seven seven times!  This makes it important.  Why?  I'll tell you!

Seven has long been acknowledged as a perfect number.  When God created the world he did so in seven days (including the day of rest . . . which one always should include).  There are seven colors in a rainbow.  There are seven days in a week.  James Bond is Agent 007.  Seven rocks!

Personally, I think seven is a cooler number than ten.  Seven is perfect.  Ten's about as ordinary as you can get.  Therefore, I have decided that my 49th post is more important than my 50th.  Who's to tell me I'm wrong?  Who gets to decide which numbers are more important?  My opinion is that my opinion is more important than whoever makes those kind of rules!

Happy 49th post, Beneath the Curls!!!

Mystery of Motivations

I realized recently just how little I've been posting lately.  I also looked back and said in several of my last posts that I would be posting more regularly.  That was a good one, wasn't it?

This has been one of the many things that has been on my mind lately.  Why haven't I been posting?  It's not that I don't have time.  It's not that I don't have thoughts.  It's not that I don't like doing it.  But back when I started, I would look forward to writing this all day.  I would think and plan about what I would write about that evening and plan my day so that I'd have time to write it.  Now, it's not the same for some reason.

Whenever all other techniques fail me, as they often do, I revert to my standard practice of overthinking it.  The mystery of my motivations (or lack there of) is no exception.  I have managed to narrow down my possible reasons to two possibilities:

1. I'm out of the swing of it.
2. Whatever reason I had for needing this blog is being better fulfilled.

I'll start with number one as it is a much simpler possible reason.

I've obviously gotten out of my habit of writing this every night.  That much is certain.  It's completely possible, however, that that's the only reason.  We humans, however inconsistent and unpredictable we may seem at times, are disgustingly consistent, predictable creatures of habit.  If writing a blog every night is not part of your routine, you probably won't do it.  If it is, it'll be difficult to not do it.

This summer, while I was working at camp, it was really difficult to have any kind of consistency in my posting.  As such, I went at least a solid eleven weeks with no consistent posting.  Supposedly, it takes six weeks to make or break a habit.  By the end of camp, I had broken this habit twice over.  With this in mind, it makes perfect sense that I haven't been writing.  It's no longer a habit or part of my routine, so I have only written when I've felt guilty about not writing or when I had a thought burning in me.

I so wish that my brain would let me stop there and accept that as an explanation of my motives:  Mystery solved!  In fact, I fully accepted this explanation for a while, but would my mind permanently accept this?

Of course not.

Thus, we come to possible explanation number two, AKA the psychologist's overly thought out and ALMOST plausible theory.

However possible, and likely, it is that I simply haven't been writing because I'm out of the habit, It's at least almost as possible that the reason I haven't been writing is deeper:  I haven't needed to.  Someone seriously over analyzing the situation (me) would say that I wouldn't have started writing this blog to begin with if I didn't need to for some reason.  Thus, the fact that I haven't been writing would suggest that this need either no longer applies to me or is being fulfilled in some other way.

Fortunately, I haven't been able to pin down any solid reason as to why I started this blog other than I had been wanting to for a long time.  Since I can't find any reason why I started it, I can't figure out how this need would be fulfilled.  I'm open to listening to any theories you have on the subject, but for now I'm satisfied with the fact that I can't find the thing that holds this whole theory together:  a reason.

Since I have (at least until someone comes up with a good reason to support number two) accepted number one, I must take responsibility for the fact that I haven't been writing.  Dang.

I won't give you the promises I have in the past.  I'm not going to say that I'm going to start writing more frequently, because we've all seen how well that's worked out lately.  If, however, I don't start writing regularly again, know that I haven't quit writing.  I'm still slowly chipping away at my novel, building a short story universe that I hope to put together into a novelette, and currently writing a Christmas puppet script.  I'm also, as soon as I finish this post, going to be looking at some other writing opportunities.

I'll do my best to write, but I make no promises.

I will give you a wholehearted, "we'll see!"  And is there really anything more than that that you can ask from anyone in this world?

Someone Else's Life

I just got back from Fall Break, one of the most wonderful times of the year.  I just had a four day weekend and I'm now coming back to classes halfway through the week.  I'm halfway done, and I haven't even started!

I spent this joyous four day weekend doing what so many of us do best:  NOTHING!  I spent the last two days reading and watching movies and TV.  What I find particularly interesting about the last couple of days is that I cannot, by any means of guilt I have thus far attempted, convince myself that it was a waste of time!  I spent my entire weekend sitting around without really DOING anything, and I can't help but consider it time well spent.  So, being my usual overthoughtful self, I must ask myself, why?

What is it about watching movies and reading books that allows me to consider it a positive use of my life?  I spent my car ride back tonight pondering this.

The best answer I've come up with is that I feel like I've accomplished something.  At the end of a movie or a book, I feel like I have done something worthy of my time.  What exactly did I do?  I sat on a couch and observed.  I know many people who would consider this a waste of time.  I also know these same people would cheerfully give up an entire day or two to watch a sporting event.  What exactly do you do their?  You stay in the stands and observe.

So what is it about observing these kind of things that makes us feel like we're doing something productive?  Why do people get excited when their football team scores?  Why do people get depressed when their baseball team is on a losing streak?  Why do people cry in movies or while reading books?  Think about it.  You aren't really a part of the football or baseball or basketball or cricket or rugby or curling team.  With the exception of gambling, their win or loss really doesn't affect your life.  You aren't really a part of the movie or a character in the book.  Whether or not the bad guy is killed or the guy ends up with the right girl will not change a thing about the way you go about your business the next day.  So why does it matter?

I finally came to what I call a conclusion for lack of a better word.  I was talking to my brother at a football game a couple of weeks ago about this very thing.  We were talking about why sports are such a successful and integral part of our lives.  What we ultimately said was that we need sports.  I would extend the same thing to movies and books.  We need them.  Why?  Because our lives are incredibly boring!

Most people spend their life going through the same routine every morning.  The go to work or school.  They see the same people, eat many of the same things, and generally do the same exact thing every day of their life.  Sports and movies allow us to get out some of our frustration with our lives.  We allow ourselves to live vicariously through these people on the field, court, screen, or page.  By observing their life, we put ourselves in their much more interesting shoes for long enough to maintain our sanity.  TV, movies, books, sports, and even celebrity gossip are so important to us because they let us live someone else's life which then makes our life seem that much more interesting.

Is this a bad thing?  Is it bad that so many people are focused on living through someone else?  Is it bad that most people spend a large chunk of their time trying to live in someone else's life?  You spend your time watching other people's lives on TV, reading other people's lives on Facebook, and even listening to and reading other people's thoughts on the news or on people's blogs.  Are you right now by reading this living your life or mine?  If you're living my life, is that a bad thing?

This is the point where I'm going to stop your leisurely stroll through my mind and force you back into your own.  Do you think living vicariously through someone else is a bad thing that should be changed, a good thing that should be left alone, or a necessary evil?  I'm not going to give you an answer.

Get out of my head and answer for yourself.

The Wicked Lion

Wow!  I hadn't realized how long it's been since I posted!

I really don't have anything particularly interesting to write right now, but I will be working very hard to give you something interesting to read over the next few weeks.

In the meantime, I'd like to talk about a thought/story that's been rattling around in my head long enough that I'm gonna have to do something about it soon.  I struck me as I was watching The Lion King in 3D.  On that note, I found it interesting that the 3D in this movie that was originally hand-drawn was significantly better than the modern Thor.

As I was watching the movie, I kept thinking about the musical (and apparently book) Wicked.  For those of you who don't know, the important thing about Wicked is that it twists the story of The Wizard of Oz so that the Wicked Witch of the West is the good guy and a victim of the "good guys" portrayed to us.  While watching The Lion King, I couldn't help but think about how easy it would be to do the same thing for Scar.  Since it has been several days and the idea continues to grip me, I feel I must act on it.

I've thought about several ways of writing it.  Right now I'm leaning toward doing it in an episodic style.  Basically, that would mean that I would write the story in smaller chunks that I would work very hard to get out on a regular basis rather than write it in one big push and have it out on the most dreaded of all days:  Someday.  I'll probably make that decision once I actually start writing it.

It should be an interesting project.

Rehumanizing the Christ Part III

In keeping with the precedent that I set forth in my last RtC, I will not be focusing on Jesus, but another figure in the Bible that I believe has become dehumanized.  This one, however, seems to have been dehumanized in the opposite direction from Jesus.  Where Jesus's emotions have been eliminated by society, this particular character's motives and emotions seem to have been distorted to a distinctly inhuman level.

Therefore, I humbly present for your consideration:

REHUMANIZING JONAH

We all know the story of Jonah, right?  Guy gets swallowed by a whale (let the "big fish" debate begin) and God gives him a second chance, blah blah blah.  In case you haven't read the story in a while, it's conveniently located in the book of Jonah in the Bible.  I'm not going to recount it here, because it's significantly more in depth than the summary I just gave and I'm going to be using some scrawny details for this.

I'm going to assume you've read it and press forward.

When God tells Jonah to go to Ninevah and preach against them, he had a vast and complicated run of emotions.  The Bible jumps immediately to Jonah running away, but let's think about it.  As best we can tell, Jonah was a prophet.  God telling him to go tell people that he wasn't happy with them was no big deal, so what was special about this one?  God was talking to someone other than the Israelites!

This meant a lot of things for Jonah.

Firstly, as many scholars have pointed out, the Ninevites were probably not on good terms with the Israelites.  Like any true patriot, in Jonah's mind, the world was better off without those pagans!  Jonah likely felt more than a twinge of excitement at the prospect of God being angry with Ninevah.  Finally, something would be done about those fish-slappers!  (Because VeggieTales is the most accurate portrayal of every Bible story ever told!)

Secondly, he would have to venture into a land where God was not recognized for the god that he is.  This message would be a lot harder to explain, because he would, in essence, have to explain God as well.  Have you ever had to explain God to someone?  It's not as easy of a thing to do as you might think.  Where do you start?  Do you jump straight to God is angry with you or do you start way back with "In the Beginning"?  Moreover, how would they react to the condemnation of a foreign God?  Would Jonah make it out alive?

Thirdly, we must combine these first two prospects.  Jonah would have to travel into foreign land and share God's message with those foreigners every self-respecting Israelite despised.  Go into an extremely fundamentalist Christian church and tell them that Muslims are going to heaven.  You're now in less than half as much danger as Jonah was in.  Imagine if someone found out where he had been told to go.  He would be shot down and chastised in so many ways for even considering sharing their God with gentiles.  It is possible he would even be cast out of society if he completed his task.

When you consider these last two, it's no wonder Jonah ran!  This wasn't a simple decision to run away.  It was a calculated move.  He thought it was his best shot.  His fear not only of the Ninevites, but of his own people far outweighed his desire to be obedient to God or his dark excitement about their condemnation.

I'm going to skip the part of the story that they taught you in Sunday School, because I think the VeggieTales version does an excellent job with this middle part.  Watch it.  It's worth it.

I'm going to skip to the end of the story.  This was actually my main inspiration for writing about Jonah.

After going into Ninevah and giving them a message that, interestingly enough, says nothing about God or his divine wrath, Ninevah repents.  Jonah, however, is angry.  All my life I was told that this was simply because Ninevah was Israel's enemy and Jonah wanted them destroyed (which is all he said in his message), but I was hit on Sunday with a powerful word that has caused people to become angrier over sillier things than Jonah:

Embarrassment.

Jonah had to have been embarrassed.  He had just spent three days going through the city telling everyone that it would be destroyed, and now God was changing him mind.  He did not say in his message that Ninevah would be destroyed unless they repent.  He simply said they would be destroyed.  How would it look if Ninevah was not destroyed?  Would he simply be a crazy person to the Ninevites?

Furthermore, he couldn't easily go back to the Israelites and tell them that God had spared Ninevah.  Then he would sound like a crazy person to them too.  Our vengeful, all-powerful God forgave a city full of sinful gentiles?  Preposterous!  You've been in the sun way too long!

He was now a crazy person by the accounts of both nations.  Where was he to go?  He had lost any sense of self-identity and dignity he had left.  What did he have left to live for?

The last straw came when God tried to teach Jonah a lesson.  After giving Jonah a plant to keep him comfortable, he took it away and made the conditions around Jonah even worse.  From Jonah's perspective, God teased him with a small taste of the comforts he had given up in obeying God's command to him and then pulled the rug out from under him.

Jonah's reaction of wanting to die was over more than just a plant.  He had given up his country and would not exactly be welcomed with open arms because he decided to share God with Ninevah.  He had been made out to be a fool when Ninevah was not destroyed.  Because he obeyed God, he was left alone and miserable in the middle of the desert, and now that very same God that was the cause of all his suffering had taken away the last blessing he had ever gotten from him!  After all this torment from following God's command, God had taken away what Jonah perceived to be his last bit of hope.

Jonah may have been wrong to say that it would be better for him to die, but can you say you would do differently if God ripped away your last shred of hope?

It's not such a simple story, now.  Is it?

Surprising Myself

Yesterday, I found myself beat over the head with inspiration.  I have found that when inspiration hits me that hard, I have to follow it before it leaves me.  You can read the resulting story here:

Merlin's Machine

Towards the end of the story, after the machine finishes and Brent starts dealing with the people, I messed up.  I really didn't mean for the story to go that way at the end.  I really like Brent, and I'm not sure whether or not this is the way I want him to go out.  If you haven't read any of my other stories, Brent is a recurring character in my stories that I have grown quite fond of.

I thought about it, and I realized that there are some possibilities I can still go with.

Before those of you who don't understand the creative process behind writing can offer the suggestion, no.  I can't change the ending.  Based on the characters I have created, the events I know are going on around the story, and the events in the story itself, that is the only possible ending.  I can't simply rewrite it and make everything ok.  If I rewrite everything, I will either come to the same result, or betray something deep within me.  There are ways to leave the story as is and repair the timeline so I'm happy with it, but the story stands.  It cannot be changed.  Especially the ending.

I also have several more stories based before this one where I can still use the character, so I don't have to give him up completely even if I don't use a loophole.

For those of you who are interested, there are currently seven stories that I have at least started that all relate to this wide reaching, surprisingly complex, storyline.  Five of them are currently on my website.  I'll be honest, I don't know everything that's going to happen, but I do know a lot more than I've said in the stories.

I actually have an unhealthily long list of questions that I haven't even answered myself.  I don't get to find out the answers to these questions until I write them.

It's a lot more exciting that way!

Second Nature

I just got back from a long weekend away, and I'm really tired.  I seriously debated about whether or not I was going to post at all.  Then, during my six hour drive back, I was struck by an odd thought that I need to get into writing before I forget it.  I figured you guys would at least pretend to be interested in it.

It all started when they read this verse on one of the programs I was listening to:

"But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing."  Matthew 6:3 (NIV)

Let me start off by saying that Matthew 6 is an absolutely amazing chapter of the Bible that you should go and read in its entirety right now.  It's chalk full of advice that the world as a whole has basically forgotten, including this little gem.

Basically, this verse is about not making a big deal about doing good works.  Imagine just how quiet you would have to keep your actions in order to prevent a part of your body from knowing what's going on.  THAT would be impressive.  It would be especially impressive in a world where there are so few truly good acts that whenever people do them, they feel like there should be a Hallelujah chorus and the entire world should pat them on the back.

That lesson, however, has been beaten to death by theologians across time.  You should know by now that I'm not really a fan of simply rehashing old ideas.

People often talk about doing your works in secret so that one hand doesn't know what the other is doing.  The thought that struck me tonight was this:  What is you did works so that one hand doesn't notice what the other is doing.

You are now probably thinking one of three things:

1. Ah, I understand.  You are most wise.
2. Dude, you just said the same thing twice!
3. There's no way he's gonna guess what I'm thinking!

If you are of the first persuasion, thank you.  I try.  If you are of the third persuasion, I got you you smart alecky little snot!  If you are of the second persuasion, I'll explain.  The key thing to notice between the two statements is what the one hand is not doing.  Look at them side by side:

Do good works so that the one hand doesn't know what the other is doing.
Do good works so that the one hand doesn't notice what the other is doing.

The important change is from know to notice.

What are some things you do that you don't notice?  Breathing, blinking, digesting, etc.  These are things that your body does automatically without you having to make a conscious effort to do them.  There are other things, however, that you don't notice until you can't do them.  Using your toes to keep your balance; bending your fingers to grasp something; moving your legs to walk from one place to another; opening and closing your jaw to break up your food; etc.  These are things that you can do consciously, but often don't actually think that much about them.

Imagine if doing good works was like that.  Imagine if doing good works was so much a part of your life that you didn't even notice you were doing it.  Imagine if it were just second nature like extending one leg after the other hits the ground.  Imagine if even if your left hand knew what your right hand was doing, it didn't think about it, because that was a part of it's typical actions.

What would the world be like if doing good works was second nature?

Just something to chew on.

Rehumanizing the Christ Part II

I have long felt that the world as a whole has lost Jesus's human identity almost completely, but I was never entirely sure why.  I came to a realization on this front the other day during the discussion following a Bible study:

The Bible is INCREDIBLY dry!

The Bible doesn't spend a lot of time on character development.  And why should it?  It's original purpose was not to be a dramatic work, but a series of attempts to record pieces of history.  Because, as we all know, the Bible is 100% unadulterated fact and everything that happened happened exactly as recorded in the Bible.  [ACHOO!]

Seriously, though, the Bible spends all of its time recording events and virtually none of its time describing the people involved.  It tells you just enough about these people to explain the events.  It does not help you understand anything about these people's personalities.  This would really not be such a bad thing.  In fact, it could be a really wonderful thing and allow you to look at it from lots of different perspectives.  Unfortunately, society as a whole has no imagination.  Because of society's unimaginative nature when it comes to reading the Bible, we have lost the humanity of not only Christ, but of virtually all the characters involved in the Bible.

When I say we've lost the humanity of Biblical characters, I don't mean we believe they're something other than human.  I don't mean we have deified them or anything like that.  What I do mean is that they have lost their complexity.  The good guys are good, and the bad guys are bad.  End of story.  The good guys have no ulterior motives than the will of God, and the bad guys want nothing more than to destroy God's people.  I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you that real people don't work like that.

With this revelation in mind, I have come to the conclusion that my original focus for "Rehumanizing the Christ" was too narrow.  Before I can get you to accept a human Christ, I believe I'm going to have to get you to accept the humanity of other people in the Bible.  Therefore, my next entries in this little "series" will be focused on rehumanizing some of the other figures in the Bible.  My hope is not for you to accept what I'm telling you in these to be the only way you look at these characters.  My hope is that you will get a taste of what these characters could have been like and to explore the possibilities that this opens up.

In the Bible study that led to my revelation, we were discussing the story of Jacob and Esau.  For those of you who don't remember the story, the part I'm going to be talking about comes from Genesis 25 and 27:

"Isaac married Rebekah.  At some point after that, Rebekah got pregnant.  She was extremely uncomfortable with the pregnancy and was very worried about it.  God told her that she would have twins and that they were already fighting and that the older would serve the younger.  Esau was born and was quickly followed by Jacob.  The two grew up, and Esau became an outdoorsy person and Isaac's favorite while Jacob became a more . . . domestic person and Rebekah's favorite (a mama's boy).  At some point, Jacob managed to get Esau to trade him his birthright for some soup.  Later on, with a TON of guidance and assistance from Rebekah, Jacob managed also to steal the blessing of the firstborn as well."  Genesis 25, 27 (MXPB)

What really got the post-study discussion going was the fact that as we were talking about the story during Bible study, everyone's motives were so pure.  I mean, love and obedience to God's will are obviously the driving forces in this story, right?  [ACHOO!]  The story of Jacob and Esau is a story of plotting, betrayal, and revenge.  I do not believe for a second that the only driving forces in the story were love and obedience.

What really drove me nuts about the Bible study was everyone's portrayal of Rebekah.  And that, dear readers, is why today's focus is:

REHUMANIZING REBEKAH

During Bible study, everyone kept coming back to Rebekah as a kind and loving motherly figure and a sort of prophetess.  All she wanted was to protect her child and fulfill God's plan in the lives of her sons.  [ACHOO!  My allergies are really bothering me today!]

Let's look at humans around you first.

Think about the people in your life.  Think about people on the news.  Think about humanity as a whole.  Generally speaking, we are self-serving creatures.  We lie, cheat, and steal to get to the top.  Many people will, and have, stab their own family and friends in the back in order to move up in the world.  This, dear children, is part of being human.  All of our motives are not nice.  Think about the things you did throughout today.  Were there times when you were self-serving?  Were there times when you did something you knew would cause problems for someone else?  Were there more times that you did self-serving things or things that would improve the lives of others?

There is a definite dark side to being human.

With that in mind, let's add some negative traits to Rebekah.  Let's really develop her side of the story and turn her into a character that you can believe.  That's the goal here, right?

Rebekah was power hungry.

Women in biblical times had virtually no power on their own.  Their only real chance of getting power was to make connections with powerful men.  This meant that they had to marry well, but it also meant that they had to raise their sons well.  Not only did they have to raise their sons in such a way that they would be powerful men, but since this powerful man would be in charge of their fate some day, they had to make sure that their sons cared enough to take care of them.

Rebekah was forewarned by God that she would have two sons and that the younger would be more powerful.  Do you think she's going to have information like that and not act on it?  No!  As the two boys grew up, Isaac, knowing full well that as the firstborn, Esau would be in charge of the family, took Esau under his wing and taught him what he believed it would take to run the family.  Rebekah, knowing full well that because of God's prophecy, Jacob would be more powerful, took Jacob under her wing.  By doing this, she ensured that when Jacob became powerful, she would be better taken care of because it was she that loved him when he was nothing.

Rebekah was impatient.

As the two boys grew up, Rebekah didn't see the results of God's words to her as quickly as she hoped.  She thought that it would be obvious early on that Jacob was more powerful, but that was not the case.  So she decided that she would hurry things along.  She did this by teaching Jacob what he would need.

She taught Jacob what it would take to claim the power in the family.  She taught him (and probably almost brainwashed him) about birthrights and blessings.  She taught him that not only were these things important and automatically the rights of the firstborn, but that they could be taken.  She also taught him some domestic arts such as cooking which would come in handy later on.  At the same time, she started planning, which leads me right into my next point.

Rebekah was manipulative.

I would like to take a moment to pause the story and look at the actual text for a moment.  Most scholars will tell you that the reason Esau traded his birthright was because in Genesis 25:34, it says "Esau despised his birthright."  I would like to point out that it does not say this until after the birthright was stolen and then, at least in the NIV, it says "SO Esau despised his birthright."  To me, this says that he despised it because it had been stolen from him.

Coming back to the characters and story, Isaac took for granted that Esau would receive the birthright and blessing.  Therefore, unlike Rebekah with Jacob, he did not see the point in teaching Esau what these things meant early in his life.  Rebekah took advantage of this.  She waited until Esau was at a weak point and then had Jacob implement her plan.

While they were still rather young, Esau came in from hunting.  He knew that Jacob always made the best food, so he went straight to his tent.  As he expected, Jacob had made a soup that smelled delicious.  Esau insisted on having some.  Jacob, per his mother's instructions, offered some soup in exchange for his birthright.  Esau, not understanding the importance of his birthright, saw the soup as being worth much more and eagerly took the deal.  Thus, the first part of Rebekah's plan succeeded.

The next part of the plot happened years later when Isaac was old, blind and about to die.  This plan is much more elaborate and much better detailed in chapter 27.  I highly recommend reading it, because I'm not going to go into it here.  Rebekah's involvement in that deception are completely obvious.  Long story short, Rebekah's plan succeeds and Jacob gets the blessing also.



Through this elegant and elaborate plot, Rebekah ensured that she was most loved by the more powerful son.  You could easily argue that she took Jacob under wing out of love.  You could easily argue that Jacob took the birthright of his own accord and that she helped him steal the blessing in order to fulfill the will of God.  Rebekah can be seen as a loving, nurturing mother and servant of God.  However, personally, I find it much easier to believe she was a lying manipulative power seeker.

I don't want you to leave here thinking that everything I wrote here is true.  Most of what I have written here has little basis in scripture and a ton of basis in imagination.  As I said earlier, my goal is not to convince you that this is how these people were.  My goal is to get you to start looking at them as actual people.  This includes looking at possible darker motives.

Not everyone's a good guy.